Saturday, November 11, 2006

   sick again.......dam meatloaf.....
yoooo^^
i'm sick again....strep throat...wow my life is amazing...i haven't been able to practice(flute wise) so yeah team<--hint sarcasim right thar...
Anderson: I lika what ur doin' right thar right thar...
Me:...0_0'' anderson...please go to sleep.

but yeah...this has been a horrible past few days...if that makes any sense what so ever.
but i might not be able to post for a while....cuz my comp. isn't charging right....like it will be charging and then it doesn't charge all the sudden. so ya know how it goes...i really hope i can get it fixed cux i really want to work on anothe novel of mine...this ones gonna be called to where a river runs.....heeeeeyyy...why don't i post the part i wrote for a school assignment......i think i'll do that now...^^ go me..then you guys can tell me what you think...its just the summery so ya know...
---------------------------------
A story can be long, or it can be short. It can stay melted into your mind for a period of time, or it can simply flutter to the depths of your soul. This story, in which I write, may do neither, or it may do both. It comes from the crevices of my very heart, and it is the reason for my very existence still upon this floating Earth.
In a lifetime, you learn to live, walk on your own, and to simply walk your own path of life full of right and wrong choices. But the most important thing you learn in a lifetime is to love. Not the love from your heart to your friends and family, but the love that is yet a whisper in your glowing soul. The love that is yet a whisper of what it can really be.
My name is Keira Nichol, and when I first fell in love, it was wrong in so many ways. I wasn’t supposed to fall in love when the war started; it just wasn’t suppose to happen that way. But unfortunately, under all the circumstances, it happened; I fell in love with Joey Vancado
********************
It was about nine when I first woke to light taps of a horse’s hoof on the rock driveway a story just below my bedroom window. I rushed to window. Maybe it would pa; he was suppose to arrive from Alabama any day now. My long, wavy, brown hair fell out of its bun and my white, silky night dress tousled at my feet just as I reached the cool glass of my window. I looked down to find that only the horse was sitting by the steps. This horse was a chestnut with a coat of color that resembled its name.
I heard a distant rapping on the door below my room. I heard my ma holler to the boy who had been on the horse.
“Joey Vancado! Come in, come in.” my mother greeted the guest, they were obviously acquaintances. The boys voice soft, yet strangely deep. I had never met this young man and I hadn’t heard anything of before; I knew all the town and their names, but this Joey I had not come across. Sure there was Joe Timpson just down the road, but he was yet a toddler. And Joey Saphight from half way across town, but his voice was much deeper and he had an automobile, not a horse; he had never even touched one in his life. No, this Joey I had not known.
“Well, first impression, first impression.” I whispered to myself sighing a little. My mother had always told me that a first impression was the most important part of meeting someone new. I had always said to heck with it, they’ll never know me if I didn’t be myself around them. Why fool them with things I normally wouldn’t do or say? But today I couldn’t just skip this ‘important’ ritual because my mother would be there to hound me on first impressions. I changes into my dress and put my hair back up in its bun. I took one glace in the mirror, as I passed, heading for the staircase. I didn’t bother putting on my shoes; he wouldn’t see my feet anyhow, the dress was just too long.
“Have you heard from your father yet?” I heard my mother’s voice say as I hit the last stair.
“No, I just remembered I was suppose to give you something that your husband gave me to give to you before he left.” He tried to spit out. My mother chuckled.
“Dear boy! Say that again!” He smiled verbosely as if to say ‘yeah right!’ but instead he said; “I was suppose to give this to you about a month ago. I forgot.” My mother took the book from his hand just as I walked in. Their heads turned my way and I nodded my head as if too say hello.
“Morning mother.” I said. “Morning Sir” I said to Joey since he was still looking my direction. He nodded.
“Joey” He said, without blinking, indicating I call him so. I smiled politely.
“Morning Joey.” I restated. He smiled and stood from his seat.
“I…better be going.” He said. He nodded to my mother, shook my hand and headed for the door. He stopped, glanced at me and then at my mother.
“Pardon, I don’t mean to be rude, but I was wondering if I could stop by for dinner tonight. My mother won’t be home, and I don’t trust my self with a flame.” He added. My mother smiled, delighted to have a guest.
“Oh no, that’s not rude of you! Of course we’ll have you over for supper. Silly boy!” she laughed. “I’ve known you since you were about a foot tall! You welcome any time you need us, day or night.”
“Thank you Mrs. Nichol.” He grinned. He tipped his cowboy had at her, then at me. “Miss.” He said before closing the door behind him. I waited for him saddle his horse before I looked back at my mother.
“If you knew him when he was a foot tall, how come I never knew him?” I asked. My mother looked up from her work; she was stitching a pair of my father’s warn pants.
“Well, the last time you met him, you were younger; I doubted you would remember him.” She answered. I thought back as far as I could, but it would be a few days before I remembered him. “He’s the son of your father’s old friend, Mitchell. They use made small trips to Alabama together, but this is the first time in many years they were able to go together. Mitchell’s wife, Carla, has been having trouble with her health and he rarely left her side. But Carla has been doing much better and finally convinced him that she would do fine a month or two on her own, if he tagged along with your father.
“Well how come daddy took the horse to go see Grandpa?” I asked, just remembering that he could have taken the Ford in the barn. “I mean Alabama is a long time away.” I added. Mother Looked back up and said;
“Well Mitchell only has Horses, he’s doesn’t have enough money for a Ford.”
“Oh.” I understood, and continued my way to the refrigerator to grab my orange juice and breakfast.

I spent the rest of the day laying in the grass, watching the white, puffy clouds tumble into each other, battling their way across the sky. I played a game my father had once taught me. It didn’t have a name, but I found amusement playing it; I looked for distinguishable figures the clouds made; like a dragon, flaming wildly at its gigantic mouth full of jagged teeth, or a fluffy, harmless rabbit eating an ashen carrot. Once I would find the things I needed I would make a story out of the things I spotted, like what it was liked to live in the sky, to be gazed at.
“Keira!?” My mother’s voice penetrated my cavernous thoughts. I lifted my head to see her head sticking out of the small kitchen window. It was wonder how she didn’t get stuck.
“What?” I hollered back.
“Get ready! Joey is going to be here in less than half an hour!” She informed me. I groaned; I had been so comfy lying on the lush grass on the hills rolling in our back yard. I stood and wiped off any particles of dirt that may have found their way onto my elegant dress. Dinner, in my time, was one of the most ‘exciting’ things when you had a young man, whom you didn’t know, that was to be at the table. I guess my mother just thought he would be a great boy for me to get involved with. I hadn’t picked the most gracious of boyfriends in town. But that didn’t mean I would go for Joey right away; I hadn’t even known him for two minutes and here my mother was, all worried I would ruin my first impression. Fah, from what I heard so far, Joey didn’t seem that interesting; all the boys I knew were interesting, to the point where everyone knew who they were; taken that this be a good or bad thing, I didn’t know.
As I walked up the stairs my mother asked if I would change my dress, for there were grass-stains on the back end already. I opened the dark, oak-wood door that concealed the room beyond it. As I walked into my bedroom I plopped down on my bed for a few minutes trying to decide which dress I would wear. Should I where my navy blue dress or my white one with engraved teal flowers? After a few minutes of debating I stood up and grabbed a random dress and throw it on. I looked at myself in the massive mirror that hung just to the right of one of my windows; I had grabbed the white dress. I put on a little make up and pulled a brush through my hair. I walked down the stairs just as Joey strode up on his chestnut horse. I helped my mother position the last plate on the table. Joey walked in;
“Thank you, for letting me come for dinner!” he said taking off his cowboy hat and leaving it on the coat rack. “Nice to see you again miss.” He said holding out his hand for me to shake. “I’m afraid I didn’t get the chance to properly introduce myself earlier this morning.” He added smiling. My mother rushed over;
“Oh that’s right! How rude of me to forget.” She started as we took each other’s hand. “This is Keira, my daughter. And Keira this is Joey, I told you a little about him this morning.” She finished and walked to her seat.
“Nice to have properly met you, Miss.” He said kissing my hand lightly. ‘He’s defiantly a gentleman’ I thought. ‘I could give him that much.’ I took my seat across from Joey and looked up at my mother. I soon realized we had no food on the plates, I shot a questioning look at my mother. Then I heard the oven beep.
“Ah finally; the roast is done.” My mother said. “Keira could you get that please?” I nodded and walked to the stove in the next room and opened the door. Steam immediately surged from the heated box. Using my oven mitts, I grabbed the clay cooking container and brought it to the table. I put it on the heat pad in the middle. I was about to sit when I realized that there weren’t any steak knifes or forks. Why had my mother been so unprepared? Once again I entered the kitchen to grab the items needed while my mother and Joey sprung up a conversation.
“Sorry I’ve been so quiet lately.” Joey apologized. “I’ve just been caught up in all of the talk about joining the war.” He added. “So I haven’t been quite myself.” He finished. My mother suddenly looked a bit anxious. I cut the meat and put some on everyone’s plate. Everyone helped themselves to the mashed potatoes and noodles.
“You mean to say that Mr. President Wilson has finally confirmed that we enter the war?” mother asked.
“Yeah.” Joey swallowed a mouthful of mashed potatoes. “As of his speech April 2nd.” He added.
“ Why would Mr. Wilson declare we enter the war after his slogan for getting re-elected? I mean didn’t it say “he kept us out of war”?” my mother added. I joined in for the first time.
“Well from what I heard it was bound to happen with all that ‘yellow journalism’ goin’ on in the big cities.” I said after swallowing my first bite. Joey looked over at me.
“Yeah, their increasing everybody’s thoughts about going to war. I mean Germany has just been egging everyone on this entire time. I mean with the Zimmermann Note and the sinking of the all our ships, everyone’s a bit anxious and ready to get back at them.” He said.
“I just don’t understand why the Germans want to get America involved.” Ma sighed.
“I think it has to do with the imperialists.” I said. Joey nodded.
“That’s exactly what it has to do with.”
“I mean with what the Zimmermann note said sounds like the Germans want help from Mexico so they can take over our land. I think it just has to do with Germany and all the new colonies they just ‘have’ to acquire.” I finished, scooping myself more potatoes.
“Mostly I think they’re just jealous about how many colonies Britain and France have.” Joey added.
“Well I don’t like any of it, and I personally don’t like talking about it when there’s food in the mix.” She indicated an end to the conversation. We ended up talking about my father and Joey’s father. A much more gentle subject for my mother to enjoy.

Once all the plates were empty of food I showed Joey to the door, and then to his horse. He grabbed his hat and followed me. I untied his horse for him and handed him the rope as he mounted her.
“What’s her name?” I asked him, rubbing the horse’s nose.
“Clover.” He answered. I smiled.
“She’s beautiful.” I said.
“Well, maybe some day if you come up I can give you a ride with her.” He insisted. I smiled, warmed by his gesture.
“And when would I be allowed to do that?” I asked, looking up at him.
“Well I’m not busy tomorrow.” He said. “I live just a few roads left of the town.” He added. I smiled, and agreed. “Well, until then; Audios.” And he pulled his horse around and galloped off. Maybe it wouldn’t be that hard to fall for him, with that rich brown hair that fell just over his deep green eyes and tan skin enhanced by the white, old English blouse that hung from his broad shoulders. I walked inside still thinking; my mother startled me by walking from behind the curtains.
“How’d you like hosting your first house guest?” she asked. ‘That’s why she hadn’t had anything prepared!’ I thought. I nudged her shoulder.
“So you’re where I get my slyness from?!” I said. “And why are you trying to set me up with some one like him?” I asked. She smiled.
“Well it worked didn’t it?” she exclaimed patting my head.
“You don’t know that yet.” I mumbled heading for bed.
“Someday you’ll understand.” She laughed up at me. I couldn’t help but smile; maybe someday I would.

********************
The walk to the town wasn’t too long from our farm. It took me not even twenty minutes to get there. As for finding his house; it wouldn’t be too hard. There was only one road running to the left from the center of town. The road was a long one; it was dusty and the potholes were plentiful. The dust covered my new cowboy boots and I tried my best to step to the side of puddles that contained gooey masses of mud. The road just seemed to stretch forever! And soon the road became familiar; one pot hole right on to the next one. But soon enough I another road leading to the left came into my view. All of the towering trees had become less thick and now I saw what had been beyond all of those massive trunks; beautiful fields of flowers stretched upon miles of rolling hills. I saw a fence in the distance and figured it must be the start of Joey’s ranch.
This road was much shorted and I found myself beside the first stretch of white fence in no time. The fence was a bit worn down, but it suite the fields perfectly. There were a few horses just inside it; there was a beautiful, tall stallion, and a shorter white one. The white one looked a bit distracted by the wind that rustled the few trees to the left of the fence. I continued to walk past the fence until I came to the start of a separate fence on the opposite side of the road. Inside this fence I spotted Clover and Joey who had his back turned to me. He was taking softly to his chestnut horse, as he ran his large hands over the smooth coat of Clovers side. I listened for a moment and then slid under the wooden fence. He heard the rustle of grass beneath my feet and turned his head.
“Did you have trouble finding us?” He asked. I walked over to him.
“No, not really. Why am I late?” I asked, my hand running through Clover’s groomed mane.
“No.” He smiled. “Just wonderin’.” He looked over at me. “You ready? Did you bring your ridin’ boots?” he asked patting Clover slightly. I nodded.
“You might have to refresh me on ridin’ thought because I haven’t rode a horse such as this one in years.” I said. He smiled.
“That’s fine, I can teach you again.” He said before fixing the reins around Clovers mouth. “I don’t use a bit’ for her, I think it hurts um’ too much when you steer while galloping.” He added.
“Yeah dad does that when he’s just ridin’ around town. But he has too when on a trip.”
“Yeah,” he said. “We’re ridin’ her bare back.” He added. “You need a boost up?” he asked. I laughed a little, tying my dress up a little to keep it from the ground.
“Do I look nearly tall enough for that?” I answered. He laughed a little.
“Not quite nearly…grow about five feet and you won’t need help.” He said before swiftly picking me up and setting me up on her when I least expected it. Clover didn’t even seem fazed by the new weight she held on her shoulders. He led her over to the fence and hopped on from the first beam. He reached around me and gathered the other rein, turning her left.
“And we’re off!” he exclaimed. We began to gallop further down the road, and a house came into view. “Put your legs tightly around her belly, and grab onto her mane for extra support. If you pull a little she won’t care…just don’t rip any our or she might get upset…she loves her hair!” he added. I smiled; the wind was just barely running through my hair. She moved so gracefully, almost as if we were just floating through the air. We galloped past her house and I waved at his mother putting clothes on the line. She beamed over at me. I had seen her a few times at the market with my mother so I think she knew who I was.
“That’s my ma!” He said over the wind that picked up as we picked up speed. “I’ll have you meet her when we get back from the field.” He added. I smiled. The wind rolled across the bareness of my arms and the sun warmed what goose bumps the air left behind. We were carried through the endless fields of wheat and flowers and I could hear a river rushing ahead of me.
“Where are we going?” I asked looked back at him.
“To my favorite place in the whole world!” he said into my ear. I smiled.
“In the whole world?” I asked.
“Yeah!” He said. “Well, what I’ve seen of it.” He added. “But I’m pretty sure that where ever I went I would consider this more priceless than what I would find there.” He finished. I smiled; it seemed he had the same love for nature, and all that was in it, just the same as me.
His arms were still around mine while he controlled the reins, and I couldn’t help but notice that every once in a while his arm would brush against mine. Normally, this would make me tense, yet though I didn’t now him that well yet, strangely I felt safer with him there than if I was alone. I don’t know why but I trusted him more already than I could my own friends. It almost felt as if I had known him all my life, but from a distance. Maybe I did remember more about being friends with him when I was almost a toddler. He probably had been only a year or so older than I.
The rushing of the water became more distinct as we became closer and closer to the woods. Soon we were passing trees, and Clover began to slow down a little. The woods weren’t very dense and the river became clearer in the distance. We finally came to a stop next to a little waterfall, which was probably only six or seven feet tall. He slid off and then helped me down. He tied clover to a tree and we found a stump to sit on.
“Well, this is it.” He said looking into the misty waterfall. “I don’t know what I would do with out this place.” He added scraping the side of his shoe on a blanket off lush, green moss. I crossed my legs and tilted my head over at him as he stared distantly at the waterfall before us.
“You come here a lot, don’t you?” I asked. He turned to look at me and nodded.
“Every chance I get.”
“What do you do? Just sit here and think?” I asked. That’s what I would have done. It seemed like a great place to come to peace with the world.
“Mostly, yeah. I just sit where were sitin’ now and clear my head. I mostly think about my father, the future and what it has in store for me. As a kid, I used to come hear when my parents upset me. And when our first horse died, I cried all day in the house, but when I came out here I smiled at all the memories I had created when I brought her our here.” He said.
“I guess nature can do that to you.” I figured. “I use to lie in the fields of flowers behind our barn until nightfall. Even then I would lay out and watch the stars.” I added. He smiled and looked up at the richly green leaves that hid the sky from our view. The oak trees towered over us, as if to say that they understood exactly what we meant. Joey’s soft voice broke my thoughts.
“When I was younger your father actually taught me a game.” He started. He broke his gaze on the leaf covered sky and looked back into my eyes. “We were all lying in the grass one day, me, your dad, and mine.” He swallowed, leaning back onto the stump, I followed in his suite. “And your dad taught me to find pictures of things, life like, in the clouds as they rolled by. And then I would make a story using the pictures I found in them.” He finished. I lost my breath for a minute and suddenly I a few flashes of memories tore through my brain as if they belonged right there in the center of my mind; memories of my father and I spending hours and hours in the back yard, and a little boy running up to us to help.
“Here.” He said, pulling me to my feet. I followed him to the edge of the woods. He pointed to a tree directly in front of us. I saw something written in the bark but I couldn’t quite make it out yet. We strode closer to it and the bark started to become clearer; there, engraved on the bark of the trees, were pictures Joey had drawn of what he had seen in the clouds. Maybe that’s why I felt so safe when I was so close to him; we were connected in ways we hadn’t known before. My father had created a similar part in both of our lives. He helped us look at the world in ways many others couldn’t. Later, I would show him the stories I had etched into the back of our barn; pictures that resembled almost the same meaning as his had.
**************************
The next few weeks were spent the same. I would walk over to his house and we would ride to the river. I eventually became a natural at riding Clover. One rainy day he presented me with the ‘genius award’ after I slipped and fell into the shallow pool just afew yards from the Waterfall. We would talk about endless nothings and watch the clouds, eventually carving stories into the trees. Every few days he would ride over and lay with my father and I behind the barn, watching the clouds roll over head. And some nights he would stay until the sun slept behind the hills and the stars beamed down upon us. Then we would star gaze and wonder what lay beyond them.
Needless to say, Joey became one of the most important people in my life. And yet farther needless to say, he became the best friend I had always needed, just as my mother had said he would. I really didn’t know what I would do without him; I don’t mean that in a cheesy way it’s just that I don’t really remember how I had amused myself before I met him. Maybe I had just slept a lot, or daydreamed too often to remember. Who knows really?
But what kind of story would this be if everything ended in happy laughter and perfect friendships? But don’t pull out the tissues yet, my heart wasn’t terribly broken. No, Joey wasn’t the kind to do that; he was the kind to keep you on the edge of your seat with bad news and deep secrets when those days came along. No, this would just be the day when I would have to find a way to live without Joey for a little while; or at least we all hoped for just a little while.
It was a rainy Monday evening. We had been out the field, lying in the moist grass as water droplets tumbled from the grey clouds.
He pointed at a group of dark fluffy clouds. “There’s a dragon.” He said, lowering his hand. I looked to where his finger had pointed.
“Yup, and there’s a man on his tail.” I thought out loud. “And…it almost appears as if he’s carrying a torch.” I added.
“hmm.” He said before closing his eyes. We went silent again, and I turned to him. I blinked back a raindrop that had fallen onto my lash. I began to wonder why he had become so quiet the last few days. I didn’t know whether to be worried or forget about it. Maybe he was just getting sick. I turned back to the sky just as he opened his eyes again. His eyes seemed a bit distant as if pondering whether or not he should say something out loud. He finally sighed and turned to me. I re-opened my eyes and waited for what ever he was finally going to spit out. He was silent again, and I finally gave in.
“When are you going to tell me why you’ve been so quiet!?” I blurted out. He smiled a little.
“I’m workin’ on it okay.” He said before turning back to the sky, letting the rain slid down his face. “He sighed again.
“I…signed up for the war.” I finally whispered.
“No you didn’t” I quickly accused him, and he smiled weakly. He closed his eyes softly again as the wind picked up a little and blew his hair all over his face.
“I leave tomorrow.” I sat up and turned to him, probably quicker than humanly possible.
“Why did you tell me sooner Joey!?” I struggled to catch my breath. He sat up slowly on his elbows. He looked down at the grass before looking back into my eyes.
“I guess…I just really didn’t know how; it just something so big it’s hard to spit it our.” He answered. Everything was silent except for the soft pattering of rain drops on my skin.
“I…I just wish you would have told me sooner.” My voice shook, mostly from being cold. He put his hand on the side of my face.
“I know. That’s why I knew I had to tell you tonight.” He whispered again. I let my forehead fall onto his shoulder.
“What if something happens to you Joey?” I asked. “You’re the best friend I’ve got.” He put is hand on my shoulder.
“Don’t talk like that.” His voice was soft and reassuring. “Just promise that you’ll take care of Clover while I’m gone. She’s gonna need someone to talk to her. My father’s gettin’ to old to handle a young one like her, and I don’t want my mama overdoin’ herself.” He said. I agreed, but consciously I don’t think I was paying attention to what I did. I started to feel a bit numb as the truth finally set in; What if I never saw him again. I pushed such thoughts from my mind and let him pull me to my feet where he hugged me warmly. I bit my lip and held back the tears that were beginning to form around the corners of my eyes. But when I was warmly in my bed, I let them drop.
**************

Then next week or so I wondered around aimlessly. The days seemed so long, and the at night the nightmares left me cold in the morning. I would put on a smile for Mr. and Mrs. Vancado when I would spend time with Clover. I think they needed that little bit of hope, for he was there only son. But behind every smile, there was that fear that nagged at your conscious any moment it got. But I just focused on keeping Clover lively and letting her know she would see him again, no matter how much I feared it would not be like so. Ever time I heard something on the radio or saw something in the newspaper, this growing fear blanketed all of my hopes and prayers. I would hear stories about how horrible the ‘trenches’ were.
For months I went about this way; not knowing where he was, or what he was doing almost left me in a panic. But that’s how Joey was; he was always keeping you on the edge of your seat. I guess all I knew I could do was keep praying I would here something about him or his army. And that’s when I met Gorge, one of my mom’s good friends.

The door bell rang as it usually would on a Saturday morning; one of my mother’s friends would usually come for breakfast of just to chat. I answered the door as usual, but this time I found a man standing before me; he looked to be about twenty-five years. His hair was messy and his skin looked almost stained from the dirt that had been their before he had tried to take a shower. I shook his hand and offered him a seat at our table just as my mother walked from the kitchen. She stopped dead in her tracks when she saw the man I now pulled a chair out for. She almost dropped the plate of biscuits she held.
“Mother?” I asked, taking the plate to set it on the table.
“George!” she breathed. They hugged for the longest time. I sat at the table, a bit dumb founded. It was then that I saw he had a wooden support for his left let. I only glanced at it for a second; I didn’t want to be rude, something terrible had probably happened. They finally broke their embrace and my mother introduced me to the man.
“I’m sorry dear, this is an old friend of mine. I’ve been worried about him for the longest time. George here went to the war about the same time Joey did.” She explained. My heart dropped for a second but I just shook his hand and told him it was nice to meet him. He sat next to my ma and we all helped ourselves to the buttermilk biscuits before us.
“It does feel like it has been forever doesn’t it Jill?” he said to my mother. She nodded.
“It sure does.” She said. “How did you get home? Before the rest of them I mean.” She asked. He finished swallowing and then answered.
“Well, might as well tell you the whole thing while I’m at it.” He started, and the sighed and began to tell us what it was like; to be in war that is. “I signed up thinking, yeah it’ll be a great way to feed my family, and I’ll get to see the world while I’m at it.” He swallowed the rest of his biscuit. “But if I could go back I would’ve stopped my hand from signin’ that paper. I’ll tell you what Jill, all they do is hand you a gun and send you to the trenches. I got a weeks trainin’ and that’s it! They say you get a few months to get prepared, but hell no. They just sent me off like that.” He snapped his finger. “And let me tell you a little thing about them trenches. Their worse than the people on the radio can even put into words. You go down in these long stretches of holes in the ground. The smell of dead bodies is just somethin’ else. I couldn’t stand it at first, bit soon I got use to it-“
“George, how could you possibly get use to that?” my mother cut in, disbelief already painted across her face.
“Let me tell ya’ Jill, with those gas bombs and bullets flyin’ through the air, you ain’t got nothin’ else you can focus on. It just became a normal smell to me, and bein’ here smellin’ these biscuits in the air is all I could ever ask for.” He started again. I became friends with everyone around me, but I couldn’t be too sure who I was going to see the next day. I just couldn’t tell you what it’s like to see one of your buddies in that much pain-” He stopped for second or two. “I’m sorry. This isn’t a story for a young lady.” He said, watching the sadness and fear creep across my face. “I should have warned you first,” he said sympathetically.
“Oh no!” I said. “That’s fine; I needed to hear what it could have been like for Joey, I just worry a little that’s all.” I said looking down. He looked at me as if in deep thought.
“He’s fine you know.” My head snapped up. “He’s doin’ better than the rest of those folks out there in the trench. I would be proud of him if I were you.” He said. “Don’t worry too much, it won’t do you any good. Look where it go me! I’m missin’ a leg!” he joked a little. I smiled weakly. How could he know? There are a thousand men in that army, how could he know him? I figured then he was just being a gentleman, trying to put a smile on my face.
“Vancado.” He said.
“What?” I breathed.
“Vancado. That’s him’s name isn’t it?” He repeated. I gasped before I could catch myself. He dug into his pocket. “He told me you would be needin’ this. The mail man tries to come as often as he can, but sometimes it just doesn’t work that way.” He added handing me the dirt encrusted letter. I clutched it in my hand as if it was the only thing I could hold onto. A tear fell from my lash but I wiped it away before anyone could take note that it had fallen.
“Thank you.” I managed to get the words to roll off my tongue. “ I don’t know what I can possibly do to…”
“Just don’t think about what might or could happen. Just think about what you want to happen. Picture him coming home and maybe you’ll feel a little relief that the war could be over soon. Just do that for him and everything will be alright.” He said.
I don’t remember the details of what happened next. I just closed my eyes and saw his smiling face again as we ran through the field, linked at the arm. And I saw him coming home, back to the river and to this side of the clouds. And I knew that I would hear his laughter once again, maybe even sooner than I could hope.
*********************
Dear Keira,
Many times I have started this letter, and finally I have pulled everything, I want to tell you, from the depths of mind. So hopefully you will understand all that I try to write as of this very moment.
I felt lost when I was first shipped over here, I couldn’t find anything that I had left behind. It was hard to picture your face, and my memories just wouldn’t comfort me as much as I prayed they would hold me together. But soon I found George. You will come to like him, I know you will. He is just like my father, only much younger may I add! He’s only from a few towns over, but we came to remember the same things about our lives as the other did. I told him about you and your mother and luckily he is good friends with your father; so this is how I come to get this letter home, for George has been injured and is to be sent home. Though this is tragic, I find it a thankful event; for now I have been able to assure you that I am fine and getting better as the days go on.
Sometimes I just get so scared over here, and I find myself wishing I were home, no matter how much I want to keep my country safe. I look for anything I can to keep me from giving up hope. Some times when it gets rough over here, I just think over the river and I see your pretty smile. No matter how dusty and dark it gets over here I always find a way to see you again. Whether I see you in my memories of if I look at the picture my mother took of us on Clover, it always gives me new strength to get back home to you and my family.
I just want you to keep hope; for as long as you have it, I will be safe. I promise you that I’ll fight my hardest until I am back. Being a soldier is my duty, and hopefully you won’t have to pay the price for my dream. Just keep faith, please. And look for me in the clouds, I see you in them every time I look up at them through all of the dust.
Being so far away from you has made me realize something that has been growing stronger; I love you.
Joey
******************************

I think this letter is what got me through it; laying him to rest I mean. And after the war ended, I still looked for him in the crowd of heroes, even though I knew he could not be found there. Now, I just look up into the clouds and I can smile because from where his soul is buried in the field, I know he can see me in the drifting white masses too.
My mother once told me a story about how roses became the symbol of love; she said they grew wildly over where ones soul rested. Like when her mother died, every spring her father would find a sprouting bush of large red roses over her grave. I think that’s why his mother planted them over his cross; to symbolize his love for life and for everyone that surrounded him.
Joey taught me something during the time I was able to spend with him. He taught me that life doesn’t have to be short; it can live for ever in the things you love. And I know this is so when I follow to where the river runs through his woods. I see all of the beautiful things he found in life when he looked up at the clouds and forever engraved them in the trunks of the trees. Life doesn’t have to be short, it can run blindly forever, just as his river does.
And the most important thing I have learned from him is this; no matter what is taken from you, you must understand that you can gain something from your loss, whether it the memories you carry with you, or a new bush of roses each spring. Make something with what you gain, and don’t forget that with pain of the loss, follows understanding of life’s little hidden secrets, and a new sense of serenity.

Comments (1) | Permalink

Monday, November 6, 2006

   yo yo wut up hoes?
omg...the huddle i must tell you.....we got to our 2pm practice and omg.....no one knew we had to memorize of music,.... and it was so retardedly disorginized; it was a disaster.....but then once practice was over and the show started...it was perfect....like amazing perfect...i don't know how we did it.....jebus must love us.....or.....nvm......hmm.....i should just stop talking about jebus...cuz i have a theory behind Christianity....but i don't want to say it out loud.....jebus might be laughing on the inside...but in the end he would probably drown me..............................................
LOL!! it's funny though!!LOL!
Jebus: l..o..l..-_-'' ....go home....
Me: ^^ you know you love me!!^^
Jebus: -_-''' drown somewhere else please...
Me: *brings him a batch of roses* ^^?
Jebus: -_-'''0_0''' *chokes* >_<"" I'M ALERGIC TO THOSE IDIOT FACE!!! *beats me upside the head with a tree*
Me: *gives him puppy eyes*
Jebus: -_-'' im not talking to you ever again....go home...before i pee on your shoe
Me: *Brings out chocolate*
Jebus: -_0.....so maybe i love you a little bit my child.....wait..your supose to be God's child....DAM!!! WHY DO I ALWAYS GET THIS WRONG!!!.............*Silence*....0-0'' i just said dam didn't i?........DAM!!!
Jebus's daddy: *appears*
Jebus: 0.0''' beaver dam beaver dam....dam of a beaver....that's all i meant^^'''''.................................
beaver dam......hehe....
me: hey look chocolate!!!*-*''
Jebus: NOOO!!!!!!! T-T'''

Comments (1) | Permalink

Friday, November 3, 2006

   HIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
OMG!!!!!!! IM SO HYPER!! I GOT SLEEP....AND LOTS OF IT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Anderson: 0_0'''''' eeeep?
but yeah team....i get to go to a wedding saterday...which would be tomorrow..........OMG IT'S FRIDAY!!!!!*runs arround room* woot! The Huddle is on sunday! im so excited....this is how it's gonna go.....the audiance is going to be seated in the auditorium and all the lights are going to go out...then their going to here the drum line start.....and then thoughs bomb things are going to go off and at the same time the band is going to sneak into the isles and start playing the song...which is and extremely powerful song....and everyone's gonna be like 0_0'''i almost peed. And then we'll continue our show and so on....but it's awsome cuz we don't just sit on the stage and play...nonono...we're going to be doing our show and so on off stage and in the crowd and so on..u have to be there to understand and all that jazz...but it's way exciting. but anywho i got sleep^^''' and caffine......and sugar......^^!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Anderson: 0.0 be afraid....be very afraid.....
Comments (1) | Permalink

» Archives